it's not you, it's me

I really don't want you to feel bad. after all we've both put into this I think it's only fair that I say this, it's not you, it's me. after all the months and tears, it's not you, it's me.

it's not your inability to share feelings, thoughts and emotions. it's not your cold attitude and unwillingness to be part of my life. it's not even the way you treat me like I don't exist in front of your friends, those rare times you've allowed us to meet, it's me.

I really appreciate your quirky insecurity that has had me jumping through hoops to appease you. that way you never got over previous relationships so that I've had to work doubly hard since the day we met. the way you never have anything to say, never have anything to add, never express any desire to be in my presence. it's not you, it's me.

it's my fault this won't work because I grew up. it's my fault this won't work because I've finally decided I'm worth more. it's my fault this won't work because though I didn't believe it possible I've finally run out of patience.

so don't feel bad, don't change who you are for me because at the end of the day sweetheart, it's not you at all.

I've just moved on.

(don't you wish you thought of this kind of stuff closer to the time?)